MTFFL

Q: Why do programmers get Christmas and Halloween mixed up?

A: Because DEC 25 = OCT 31

Please keep your vulgarities to yourself.

you programmers don't make any sense!

C'mon now. That's funny.

Another one of my favorites:
There are only 10 types of people in the world. Those that understand binary and those that don't.

The Top 20 Things Overheard from Programmers When Things Go South

"That's weird..."

"It's never done that before."

"It worked yesterday."

"How is that possible?"

"It must be a hardware problem."

"What did you type in wrong to get it to crash?"

"There is something funky in your data."

"I haven't touched that module in weeks!"

"You must have the wrong version."

"It's just some unlucky coincidence."

"I can't test everything!"

"THIS can't be the source of THAT."

"It works, but it's not been tested."

"Somebody must have changed my code."

"Did you check for a virus on your system?"

"Even though it doesn't work, how does it feel?"

"You can't use that version on your system."

"Why do you want to do it that way?"

"Where were you when the program blew up?"

"I thought I fixed that."